My child has a mental health disorder: What should I do?

by Jotie Mondair, LPC

Parenting a child who has recently been diagnosed with a mental health disorder or is in therapy for the first time can be a challenging and emotional journey. As a parent, your role in supporting your child during their therapeutic process is crucial for their progress and well-being. The most common mental health disorders in children are ADHD, anxiety disorders, behavior disorders, and depression.

ADHD: Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a prevalent mental health disorder in children characterized by difficulties with attention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity. It affects a child’s ability to focus, control their behavior, and may impact academic performance and social interactions.

Anxiety Disorders: Anxiety disorders encompass a range of conditions such as generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, and specific phobias. Children with anxiety disorders experience excessive worry or fear that can interfere with daily activities and relationships.

Behavior Disorders: Behavior disorders include disruptive behavior disorders like oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) and conduct disorder. These disorders involve persistent patterns of defiant, aggressive, or antisocial behaviors that violate societal norms or the rights of others.

Depression: Depression is a serious mood disorder that can affect how a child feels, thinks, and behaves. Symptoms may include persistent feelings of sadness, hopelessness, loss of interest in activities, changes in appetite or sleep patterns, and thoughts of self-harm or suicide.

Here are some practical tips and strategies to help you support your child in therapy:

1. Seek help/support from professionals. If you haven’t done so already, connect with a mental health professional who specializes in treating children/ adolescents. It’s also important to contact the child’s pediatrician to inform them of any diagnoses and treatments the child is involved in. The pediatrician can support with medication consultation, if necessary, or refer to a psychiatrist. If the mental health condition is impacting the child’s ability to perform in school, contact their school counselor to explore school-based supports (e.g. creating a 504 Plan or IEP to address specific needs and potential accommodations).
2. Educate yourself about your child’s diagnosis and the treatment options. The internet can be an overwhelming place, however, there are several websites that are credible and can be great resources to you and your family.
   a. NAMI
   b. CDC
   c. SAMHSA
   d. Child Mind Institute
3. Create an environment that fosters communication. Effective communication between children and parents can help children feel less scared, vulnerable, and helpless. Share with them the steps you’re taking to support them, help them identify strategies to cope, and use nonjudgmental language about treatment.
4. Practice ACTIVE listening. When your child wants to talk about their feelings or experiences, practice active listening. Give them your full attention, maintain eye contact, and show empathy without interrupting or offering immediate solutions. Sometimes, just being there to listen is what they need most.
5. Be sure to address biological needs! Most children require 10+ hours of sleep per night, and many get less than 8 hours! Mental health symptoms can be exacerbated by poor sleep (short duration/ quality), poor nutrition, and dehydration. Create a schedule that prioritizes sleep, health, and positive activities.
6. Implement therapy techniques at home. Collaborate with your child’s therapist to learn about the techniques used in therapy sessions. Incorporate these techniques into your daily routine at home to reinforce the skills learned during therapy. Practice relaxation exercises or coping strategies together to support your child’s progress. This allows the child’s growth and learning to be normalized within the family system.
7. Offer positive reinforcement. Acknowledge and praise your child’s efforts and achievements in therapy. Celebrate even small milestones to boost their self-esteem and motivation. Positive reinforcement can encourage continued progress and resilience.
8. Cultivate patience and understanding. Therapeutic progress takes time, and setbacks may occur along the way. Be patient with your child’s journey and avoid placing unrealistic expectations on them or yourself. Understand that healing is a gradual process that requires support and understanding.
9. Be a positive role model. Children often learn by example, so demonstrate healthy coping mechanisms and problem-solving skills in your own life. Show them how to manage stress, navigate difficult emotions, and maintain a positive outlook even during challenging times.
10. Attend family therapy (if recommended): If family therapy is recommended by the therapist, actively participate in sessions to address underlying family dynamics, and improve communication within the family unit.

By implementing these strategies and being actively involved in your child’s therapeutic journey, you can provide essential support that complements the work done in therapy sessions. Be sure to take care of yourself, take breaks, reach out to friends and loved ones for support!